Making the Best of It

 

Have you ever worked really hard at getting a family history written, only to have one single person put a stopping block in your way?

You know the one I'm talking about. That person who says, "I don't want you to put my parents names in your history!" (Or grandparents, or my branch of the tree, or some such thing.)

When you try to explain you are only writing the history, and won't put in any personal information other than birth, death and marriage dates, they become furious! They don't want any of their family information included!

So, how do you handle that kind of situation. 

Of course, if the party is living, I will leave it out. I never publish private information on anyone who is living without their express consent. However, if the information is more than 75 years old, I go ahead with publication. It is all a matter of public record. I do try to be as discreet as possible for individuals who adamantly don't want their next generation listed. But sometimes, these are elderly individuals (those making the demands), and their parents have been gone many years. 

It isn't possible to please every one all the time, although we all try to. To be certain that we don't break any laws, we do not use any conjectures, or theories. We only deal in cold, hard facts. No second hand stories from a third cousin 4 times removed, etc. 

Be sure to check that you have citations for your facts. And use ONLY facts. 

Making the best of a bad situation is about all we can do in the end. 

However, if what you are compiling is a private family tree, for your eyes only, you can include whatever you want! Just make sure you document, document, document where you got your information from!

Have you ever had to face this kind of situation? What did you do? If you haven't faced this, what would you do?