Sympathy Saturday - Those Memorial Bookmarks

I have a very special collection. It's one I don't get out and look at very often. And thankfully, it isn't a large collection.

It's those Memorial/Obituary bookmarks that the funeral home provides for you when a loved one has passed away. Sometimes the newspaper will even notify you that they can make them for you, as well. And I suppose that's a regional type of tradition. Maybe it's something you've never even heard of before.

They are quite simple. Just a copy of the loved one's obituary, as printed in the local newspaper, laminated. The reverse side usually has a copy of the 23rd Psalm.

There's one that I have, that I haven't been able to add to the small collection I have, yet. I keep it my Bible. And I look at it almost every day. It has a photograph of a woman I knew for over 50 years. She was there for me through almost every trial I ever went through. She wiped away more tears than anyone else. She held my hand. And she didn't mind telling you she kicked my backside a few times as well!

Yes, you guessed it. It's my Mom's memorial bookmark.

She was stunning to look at! And yes, she was in the WACs. (Women's Army Corps.)

The reverse side of the book mark.

Do you have any of these? If so, here you have a viable record of the person's life! In this one, you learn her full name, date and place of birth. Date of death and burial, and where she is buried. Along with her parents names, siblings names, children and grandchildren's names. And her military service, as well as previous occupation and education.

So, when you come across a small collection of these, hang onto them. They can be invaluable to your research! A lot of people keep them in their large Family Bible, so you can start looking for them there. Some bundle them up with sympathy cards, and put them away in a box. Wherever you find them, hang onto them.

If you've found this post helpful, let us know!

Sympathy Saturday

Chuck Barris

1929-2017

The past few months have been wrought with celebrity deaths, proving that only two things in life are guaranteed: Taxes and Death.

One of the ones that really caught my eye, along with that of the infamous Chuck Berry, was another Chuck. Chuck Barris.

How many remember watching The Gong Show"? It was a great little 30-minute primetime television .Wikipedia has this to say about it: "It was broadcast on NBC's daytime schedule from June 14, 1976, through July 21, 1978, and in first-run syndication from 1976 to 1980 and 1988 to 1989. The show was produced by Chuck Barris, who also served as host for the NBC run and from 1977 to 1980 in syndication. The show is best remembered for its absurdist humor and style, often awarding participants ridiculous and worthless prizes."

I absolutely loved the show! You got a bellyful of laughs. But some great acts were cast from that show's participants as well.

Who can forget Chuck Barris as he sometimes comedically took the stage to host the show? And he did so that everyone, guests and participants had the best time ever! Those watching from home had to keep coming back the next week, just to see who, and what, was going to be on!

How many of you know that Barris produced the show? Or that when the Gong Show first arrived on the scene, Barris was already an old hand at creating and producing game shows? I'm sure you will remember The Dating Game, and The Newlywed Game. He also wrote music. His biggest hit being Pallisades Park" in 1962.

Did you know that the hit film, directed by George Clooney, A Dangerous Mind, was based on Barris'  autobiography of the same name? He claimed to have been a CIA assassin from the 60's to the 70's. He wrote a sequel to that book, Bad Grass Never Dies, in 2004. However, it never reached the acclaim of the first book.

Barris will not be forgotten. He passed away this past Tuesday, March 21, 2017, at his home in Pallisades, California from natural causes. He was 87 years old.

While no relation, Chuck Barris was an icon from my late teens until my mid-twenties. And I highly admired his work, which has barely been touched here.

Sympathy Saturday

Last week, my cousin, Pam, lost her husband. I never did find out what happened. Just that was fine one moment, and gone the next. Jim will be missed. I only saw him at family reunions, but he never failed to make me laugh!

James R. Young

1960-2017

James R. “Wetback” Young, 56, of Madams Creek passed away Friday, January 13, 2017 at his home following a sudden illness.

    Born November 25, 1960 at Presque Isle, Maine he was a son of Ople H. “Sarge” Young Jr. of Madams Creek and the late E. Marilyn Young.

    James was an U.S. Air Force Veteran and a former utility worker for Asplundh and Weatherby Guns. He enjoyed hunting, fishing, his dog, sports - Dallas Cowboys and NC Tarheels and NASCAR- Jeff Gordon.

    Besides his father those left to cherish his memory include his wife, Pamela A. Young at home; beloved dog, Bear; three siblings, Liz Young Huffman and husband Greg of Jumping Branch, Opie Young III and companion Kami Sisson of Pipestem and Robin Young Jeffries and husband Eric of Jumping Branch; two nephews, Justin Young and Austin Dunn; three nieces, Emy Young, Kara Via and Makaylah Jeffries; one great nephew, Carson Young; one great niece, Hadley Dunn and father and mother in law, Jack and Vivian Ashley of Hinton.

    Funeral services will be 11:00 A.M. Monday, January 23, 2017 at Ronald Meadows Funeral Parlors Chapel with Pastor Robbie Merritt officiating. Burial will follow in the Lilly-Crews Cemetery at Nimitz. Friends may call from 6:00 – 8:00 P.M. on Sunday at the funeral parlors.

    Pallbearers will be Bo Jeffries, Billy Kleintop, Pat Noble, Alan Harvey, Jackie Ratliff and Chip Johnson. Honorary pallbearers will be Justin Young, Austin Dunn and Lot Williams.


Arrangements are by the Ronald Meadows Funeral Parlors of Hinton.
Condolences may be sent to the family at www.ronaldmeadowsfp.com

"Go rest high on that mountain,

    Son your work on earth is done,

  Go to Heaven a shoutin',

    Love for the Father, and the Son"

Sympathy Saturday - No Funeral - No Grave

Here's a tip for you if you are researching your family tree, and can't find any information regarding a funeral, or find a grave for a relative.

Consider that the person may have been cremated!

In this case, unless someone living can clue you in, or an obituary turns up telling you this bit of fact, you may need to spend the money needed to order a death certificate, which usually lists how the body was disposed of [ie: burial, cremation, etc.]. Sometimes this is the ONLY way to determine for sure what happened to your ancestor when the died.

Sympathy Saturday - An Old Timey Wake

Many years ago, when I was married to my first husband, I was exposed, for the first time, to a real old-fashioned wake.

When MawMaw Jones [aka: Della Mae Morris Jones: 1897-1977] passed away, her family had the funeral home prepare her body, and then bring it back to the house. The front living room was cleared out except for sofa and chairs. Extra chairs were brought in from the funeral home. The coffin was placed against the wall, and everyone in the immediate family sat up all night long with the body. Keeping a "Wake" over it.

This was a new, and unusual practice to me. I had been raised in the city, and we simply didn't know anyone who brought the body to the house! Much less stayed up all night with it! I found it a bit creepy actually, and prayed the whole night for morning and sunlight!

In our own family, one visits the funeral home the evening before the funeral, and has a "visitation" where family and friends gather. Mourners stand by the coffin and look in at the deceased. I am ever tickled, at times near the point of guffawing out loud, when someone leans over, stares at the deceased and says, "He/she sure does look good, don't ya think?"

Uhm... excuse me! They're dead! Do you really think dead looks good on them?

I'm one of those individuals that does not visit the funeral home when either [A] I didn't know the deceased, or [B] I didn't visit them when they were alive! I know so many people who will go to a visitation because the deceased was someone related to someone they knew. In other words, someone you are an acquaintance with [say a co-worker] has a relative who dies, the curious will either attend the visitation or the funeral. They will tell you "I'm here outta respect." We all know the truth... they are there because of curiosity, or morbidity!

If I either didn't know the deceased, or I wasn't friends or close family with them... I do not attend. Plain and simple.

I am also one of those individuals who do not send flowers to a funeral. I figure if I'm going to send flowers, I'll send them to the living. NOT to decorate someone's grave! More often than not, I'll cook a meal, or provide financial assistance if the survivors need it [I live in a rural area, where nearly everyone is financially strapped, so a monetary gift to the surviving family is the norm for our neck of the woods, as well as cooking a meal or dessert.]

Following the funeral in our area, family and relatives gather back at the deceased's house. And a huge meal is spread. Usually by friends, and church members.

When Grandma Bean passed away on 01 Jan. 1975, we all gathered back at my parent's house, as she'd lived with us for ten years.

My Great-Aunt Veda on 03 Jan 1975, followig Grandma's funeral.

Chairs were brought into the living room to make extra seating. A huge feast was spread in the dining room, and folks wandered in and out, fixing themselves a plate and taking it elsewhere to eat.

After an hour or so, those who were there out of curiosity began leaving one by one. Some attend just for the food! Some of those there "out of respect" began leaving about the 90-minute mark. While close family were there until the wee hours of the morning.

When Granny Dreher died in 1989, Mama shipped her body back to Indiana, so she could have her funeral there, and she could be placed to rest next to Grandpa. Her "visitation" began at 10 a.m. the day before the funeral, and lasted until 11 p.m. Talk about exhausting! And after her funeral the next day, family gathered at my Aunt Ethel's, and were there until the very late hours of the evening. I simply felt I could not go on, and had to drive back home the next day, an exhausting 8-hour drive!

My husband and I have decided that we want to be cremated, and forego a lengthy visitation and funeral. Should family wish to gather and say goodbye, let them share a toast of my favorite whiskey, and scatter my ashes to the four winds. Let them not weep as I join my ancestors, but instead, let them rejoice at my homecoming.

Now that's a send off to me!